Uncategorized – Page 8 – Pamela Klier-Weidner (PKW)

I am Woman, Hear Me…

Roar? No. Just hear me.

Sometimes, I have a mighty roar, and other times, like now, my roar is dormant. It’s not dead, but I can scarcely meow at this moment, let alone voice an empowered, roar.

This will pass, it always does but only with practice.

I am writing this blog post on my phone. My computer died last night and unlike the charming, “mostly dead,” of The Princess Bride, or my sleeping roar, I’m pretty sure my computer is totally dead.

My girls and I live pretty lean, but I will need to buy a computer. Shit happens. It sucks, but it isn’t war, poverty or abuse. Things can always be worse.

And speaking of worse,

I have been painfully triggered lately, so much of my time is spent practicing mindfulness and other estimable actions that help keep me centered.

So, I am posting this truth, to state in a public way, that sometimes, difficult personal histories come up, and can even frighten us,

BUT,

the roar… our roar… the one that isn’t really about anger, but packs a loving punch of empowerment, returns with the practice of estimable action.

Be your own advocate. Ask for help from people who are safe, and practice your ass off. It works. I am a living testament that it works and being external facing about it has no shame attached to it, period.

And now, I feel a “meow” coming on and when it’s ready, my roar will reappear.

Yours will too.

In the meantime, if you have to negotiate a terrific price on a new computer, and your empowered roar is still snoozing, ask for help from one of your safe people. Pick the best negotiator.

WE are not alone and roar or not, I hear you. I always will.

I love you.

Not Being in Love: A Love Story

When I find myself questioning my decision to open myself up on such an external level, (and I question it with great frequency), someone ALWAYS approaches me about how something I’ve shared helped them in some way. Sometimes, a reader simply feels less alone, and breathes a sigh of relief that the committee that lives in their head, (and has way too many meetings), isn’t much different from mine. Continue reading “Not Being in Love: A Love Story”

Boxing Gloves & Kid Gloves

Dukes up.

Boxing gloves on.

Ready for the big fight, flight, or, freeze. Continue reading “Boxing Gloves & Kid Gloves”

Jewish or Bust: Who Will Make the Cut?

You’d think through my many years of working professionally to combat anti-Semitism in the nonprofit sector and Jewish philanthropy, I’d have come to certain realizations much sooner than I have. Continue reading “Jewish or Bust: Who Will Make the Cut?”

It’s Motherhood, NOT Mother-should

For the past several days, it’s been challenging to show up as an enthusiastic mother of my almost 14 and almost 11 year old daughters. I don’t feel this way very often, but when I do, I feel it and hard. Whenever I get like this, I try to remember them as my beautiful little babies before I became COE. (Chief of Embarrassment.)

Continue reading “It’s Motherhood, NOT Mother-should”

Mirrors, Photos, & a Reality Touch

Ever since social media took flight, I have posted a slew of photos of myself in various states of being. This act has garnered a mixed response from my family, friends, acquaintances and virtual strangers. Some people see it as incredibly vain while others perceive an exceedingly confident woman who finds her physical appearance and its twists and turns, interesting.

It’s really neither of those things, I think. Continue reading “Mirrors, Photos, & a Reality Touch”

My Love Shack(les): Break Free.

Ever since my divorce and especially lately, I’ve been thinking about what being “in love,” actually looks and feels like. I’m pretty sure it’s a terrible idea to carry these thoughts on for too long in one’s head, especially with the committee that resides in my noggin. Still, for several weeks, I’ve been extra “think-y” about the qualities I’ve spotted in the men I tend to fancy the most. Continue reading “My Love Shack(les): Break Free.”

Little Girl Found, Kicking & Screaming

And once she learned to kick and scream, the monsters quieted down.

When she knew she was safe to stop kicking and screaming, the monsters left

forever.

She was left with some permanent scars that she saw as rich and beautiful, because they were perfect to her and not because they had to be, but because they just were.

The little girl healed and the woman flourished.

The little girl and the woman agreed to coexist as the caretakers of each other and providers of the ointment that would protect and honor her scars

forever.

Continue reading “Little Girl Found, Kicking & Screaming”

Feelings… wo wo wo… Feelings

I spend a great deal of time and energy thinking, writing about, examining, preaching, ripping apart and putting back together, all things about “FEELINGS.” I have no doubt that this is time and energy well spent. (This is your cue to roll your eyes.)

Time and time again, embracing feelings and the depth of feelings that I feel or have felt, almost immediately turns me to examining facts – I am an ardent supporter and believer in evaluating and trusting facts over feelings, but processing feelings is a MUST. Continue reading “Feelings… wo wo wo… Feelings”

The Expert Neophyte

In my professional life, I take comfort AND yield countless benefits, from approaching things as a hungry collaborator who doesn’t know more than you do, no matter what the organizational chart says. I internally (and sometimes externally) overtly identify as a neophyte (with extensive experience in leadership behind me), on a wide variety of subjects. I find this tactic not only propels my openness to learning and growth, but helps me perform with my ego checked at the door long before a project actually begins. (The more egos that can be checked at the door, obviously, produce fun and successful teamwork.) This often creates a level playing field, and an empowered ensemble that implements great work. Continue reading “The Expert Neophyte”